Me and people

This post especially expresses thoughts that touch on my own life. Thanks again Susanne for expressing your thoughts and experiences xxx

Meanwhile, in the real world...


For as long as I can remember I’ve had people telling me I should be more like this, more like that – more confident, less shy, less anxious, more outgoing etc.etc. And so I try to be more like this and more like that and an unhealthy self-loathing emerges whenever I fell short.

To avoid hurt I did all that I could to ignore the elements of myself that didn’t fit my long held image of “Who I should be.” I pretended to be that person to the world, blagging my way through as best I could while making mental notes of every scrap of social etiquette I came across, constantly refining myself and trying to improve.

All the while I was pretending and blagging underneath it all lurked this feeling that I wasn’t good enough, words like “fake” and “pretentious” irked me like they were trying to tell me…

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Author: yarnandpencil

I'm a Christian on the autistic spectrum blogging about life and my art/craft practice.

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